I'm being an entitled food snob right now, aren't I.
[His mind is aghast at a kitchen without some culinary staples when Kate has clearly survived on her own just fine without them. Hell, even he lived without fresh lemons for a large portion of his life. Sometimes it's good to remember that.
He begins to spread the avocado on the toast and then just dot it with the hot sauce on his end. A little spice went a long way for his tastebuds. Kate's half of the bread he offers her the hot sauce to add as she wants.]
They are sweet. And so proud of their heritage and what they've made here for themselves. I like hearing them talk. If I wasn't so stinky I'd probably have asked them more questions.
Nah, you're just being an idiot making a big deal over nothing.
[With her coffemaker having squeezed the goods out of that capsule and filled that second mug, Kate comes to join Matt, taking the other side of the couch. She grabs the hot sauce and, goes a little overboard, definitely putting more than a couple of dots.]
I never kid when I say they're the best pizza in town. And the very top of my food pyramid.
My friends being healthy is a big deal to me. I used to argue all the time with...
[His voice trails away then. With Foggy. How many times had Matt chastised his friend for eating junk food? How often had he annoyed Foggy by stopping to savor and indulge in local fresh farmer's market goods? Countless.
Matt shares a small piece of avocado with Lucky before taking a bite himself.]
What if I sometimes brought you single servings of healthy meals? Nothing to go bad and no cooking needed on your part. It's hard for me to cook for just one person, anyway. Win-win with sharing the leftovers.
[Kate doesn't miss that slip. How Matt censors himself. How Foggy's ghost lingers in their heart, specially considering the last time Matt visited the four of them had shared pizza, unaware that they would never be together again.
Kate's eating slows down.
She still remembers how Foggy would loosen his tie, ending up on the floor playing with Kate's dog. How both Matt and her gave him directions as he played around with her boxing bag. How she and Karen encouraged them both to pretend there was a catwalk in the middle of Kate's apartment, putting up a little show.]
Are you serious? About this not being trouble for you.
[It's hard to believe sometimes that a year has passed. A year since Foggy died, a year since Karen left. So much has happened since then, some good and some tragic. He's built a new life for himself, yet in moments like this, the two periods of his life feel blurred. He misses his friends. He's grateful for the friend he still has with him on the sofa. Kate is one of the few people who also had a before and after period that he recognizes.]
I'm serious. It's no trouble. The only other person who sometimes eats at my place is Heather. I always end up making more than I can eat, and I like feeding people. And dogs. I didn't forget that you'll share it with him, too.
[She doesn't want to point out the elephant in the room. Because even though Matt mentioned this would be a sometimes deal, at the same time its a promise that even if things change in the city again, even if he never puts back on the suit, he won't disappear again from her life.
Because it feels like walking on this ice. As if, at any time, this will all go away again. Matt, he has rebuilt his life. Has even found someone.
Matt doesn't even say Foggy's name outloud.
But then, neither does she.]
If you're offering to feed Lucky too now I can't turn it down, can I?
[She shouldn't. She should keep her distance. But Kate is a touchy person, she can't help herself.
I figured adding in the dog would sweeten the deal. Some of what I make is probably all right for him to have.
[It's an added warmth and weight when Kate leans against his side, with Lucky curled up on his other. Matt is an equally tactile person and welcomes it. He figures most of those who reach out in such a manner need it, too. He just rests his head against hers for a moment, a silent acknowledgement that it's fine.]
You're welcome. Thank you for letting me stay here.
[Her heart is beating a little faster and she is uncomfortably aware of it. But is that something people can control? Maybe she needs to pick up meditation like Matt suggested once. Except, it always makes her sleepy, whenever her mind is not running on a million thoughts at the same time.]
I was actually happy that you texted. That you thought of me and trust me.
I know he's used to a pizza diet but in good conscience I have to give him something without a lot of salt and cheese.
[He lightly strokes Lucky's head, aware of Kate's heartbeat but he politely doesn't make any mention of it. He can't help but notice things about people, but he tries not to pry or make a big deal out of it. The last thing he wants is for his friends to pull away from him because of his abilities.]
I knew I could trust you. I hope you know that you can trust me, too.
I'm glad that we didn't burn our bridge. Well. Not beyond repair, at least.
I like to cook a lot of different things. It's fun to experiment, and I love all different types of cuisine. So it's kind of whatever smells good at the farmer's market is what I take home and try. Just know that vegetables will be involved, and no preservatives.
I wasn't sure if you wanted to hear from me. After I told you about Foggy, neither of us reached out. I thought you might have wanted space. I'm sorry if that was wrong.
You're such a Hallmark kinda guy, did you know that? [She huffs out a quiet laugh.] Good catholic boy, with a degree, helping people, going to the farmer's market and cooking. Like, men writen by women.
[Without realizing it, Kate shakes her head.]
I was thinking the same thing. He was your best friend. I didn't know what to say, I was just kinda hoping I'll see you around at night but then you stopped showing up. And I can't blame you, you were dealing with a lot.
And to think I was raised by men. One who definitely never watched Hallmark a day in his life.
[The very thought of Stick though putting on that channel amuses Matt.]
It was a screwed up time for all of us. Just glad that it wasn't screwed up permanently. And even though the city is shit right now, I'm also glad that you're still here. It's going to get better again. It has to.
Fisk wasn't always in office, and he won't always be in office. There are some shitty officials but there are also some good ones, too. The city won't ever be perfect, no, but it can be better than it is now. It does matter that each serial killer is put away, because that does make things safer. Even if it doesn't mean all crime will stop forever.
What we do matters. And the city is worth fighting for, always.
[And yet, as optimistic and bubbly as Kate normally is, she suddenly seems to deflate. She hides her face in her palms, scrubbing it roughly as she groans.
But a soft ring coming from upstairs makes her straighten up again.]
[His gaze, as always, doesn't quite meet her eyes. It falls just short, drifting to the side, but his head is inclined in her direction to show she has his focus. That he hears the change in her tone.]
[For a brief moment it felt like an exit. Stepping away from this conversation and knowing he will get dressed and this will be over. The bubble is close to bursting. Back to the shit normal life has turned into.
But Matt suprises her in a way that he shouldn't. Or rather, she shouldn't be surprised that he's here, in the present, showing he cares like he used to. Kate simply shakes her head, staring into those dark eyes that are far from meeting her gaze but still make a connection.]
[It does. Surely he will notice in the way she snorts, the way the corner of her lips curve lightly into a soft smile. Kate tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.]
It feels like things keep getting worse and worse. And when things start feeling a little closer to normal, it all goes to shit again.
[Lucky, sensing his human's distress, crawls across Matt's lap to where he can rest his large, furry head on Kate's lap. Matt smiles a little at the dog's gesture. Sometimes it was so simple for a pet and so hard for a human. A lesson to take away when he's feeling less tired.
He's quiet for a moment, letting Kate's words carry the weight they deserve. He won't discount what she's saying or feeling. He gets it, as much as he wants to make it easier for her to bear as a burden.]
I know you can take anything. As you friend though, I don't want you to just survive. I want to make something go right for you if I can. And I want you to know you're not alone when things do go wrong.
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Sounds like we need to go food shopping.
And they didn't hold me too long. Just enough to tisk over how I looked and share some bread history.
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[Except for lemons, clearly.
Bringing over the bread, the little that's left of the avocado and the hot sauce, Kate places it on the coffee table right in front of Matt.]
They're the sweetest, right? They always ask about you guys.
[Guys. It feels like a lifetime ago.]
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I'm being an entitled food snob right now, aren't I.
[His mind is aghast at a kitchen without some culinary staples when Kate has clearly survived on her own just fine without them. Hell, even he lived without fresh lemons for a large portion of his life. Sometimes it's good to remember that.
He begins to spread the avocado on the toast and then just dot it with the hot sauce on his end. A little spice went a long way for his tastebuds. Kate's half of the bread he offers her the hot sauce to add as she wants.]
They are sweet. And so proud of their heritage and what they've made here for themselves. I like hearing them talk. If I wasn't so stinky I'd probably have asked them more questions.
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[With her coffemaker having squeezed the goods out of that capsule and filled that second mug, Kate comes to join Matt, taking the other side of the couch. She grabs the hot sauce and, goes a little overboard, definitely putting more than a couple of dots.]
I never kid when I say they're the best pizza in town. And the very top of my food pyramid.
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[His voice trails away then. With Foggy. How many times had Matt chastised his friend for eating junk food? How often had he annoyed Foggy by stopping to savor and indulge in local fresh farmer's market goods? Countless.
Matt shares a small piece of avocado with Lucky before taking a bite himself.]
What if I sometimes brought you single servings of healthy meals? Nothing to go bad and no cooking needed on your part. It's hard for me to cook for just one person, anyway. Win-win with sharing the leftovers.
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Kate's eating slows down.
She still remembers how Foggy would loosen his tie, ending up on the floor playing with Kate's dog. How both Matt and her gave him directions as he played around with her boxing bag. How she and Karen encouraged them both to pretend there was a catwalk in the middle of Kate's apartment, putting up a little show.]
Are you serious? About this not being trouble for you.
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I'm serious. It's no trouble. The only other person who sometimes eats at my place is Heather. I always end up making more than I can eat, and I like feeding people. And dogs. I didn't forget that you'll share it with him, too.
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Because it feels like walking on this ice. As if, at any time, this will all go away again. Matt, he has rebuilt his life. Has even found someone.
Matt doesn't even say Foggy's name outloud.
But then, neither does she.]
If you're offering to feed Lucky too now I can't turn it down, can I?
[She shouldn't. She should keep her distance. But Kate is a touchy person, she can't help herself.
Leaning in, she rests her head on his shoulder.]
Thank you, Matt.
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[It's an added warmth and weight when Kate leans against his side, with Lucky curled up on his other. Matt is an equally tactile person and welcomes it. He figures most of those who reach out in such a manner need it, too. He just rests his head against hers for a moment, a silent acknowledgement that it's fine.]
You're welcome. Thank you for letting me stay here.
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[Her heart is beating a little faster and she is uncomfortably aware of it. But is that something people can control? Maybe she needs to pick up meditation like Matt suggested once. Except, it always makes her sleepy, whenever her mind is not running on a million thoughts at the same time.]
I was actually happy that you texted. That you thought of me and trust me.
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[He lightly strokes Lucky's head, aware of Kate's heartbeat but he politely doesn't make any mention of it. He can't help but notice things about people, but he tries not to pry or make a big deal out of it. The last thing he wants is for his friends to pull away from him because of his abilities.]
I knew I could trust you. I hope you know that you can trust me, too.
I'm glad that we didn't burn our bridge. Well. Not beyond repair, at least.
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[It's only once Matt starts talking about how things changed between them that she straightens on her spot, pulling away from him.]
It's not like you ghosted me just because. Things went to shit. I missed you, but I know you had a rough time.
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I wasn't sure if you wanted to hear from me. After I told you about Foggy, neither of us reached out. I thought you might have wanted space. I'm sorry if that was wrong.
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[Without realizing it, Kate shakes her head.]
I was thinking the same thing. He was your best friend. I didn't know what to say, I was just kinda hoping I'll see you around at night but then you stopped showing up. And I can't blame you, you were dealing with a lot.
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[The very thought of Stick though putting on that channel amuses Matt.]
It was a screwed up time for all of us. Just glad that it wasn't screwed up permanently. And even though the city is shit right now, I'm also glad that you're still here. It's going to get better again. It has to.
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[Kate reaches for her coffee, really needing something to do with her hands. Something else to focus on.]
Yeah, I mean. It's not like politics are going to completely screw our lives or like serial killers don't ever grow bored.
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What we do matters. And the city is worth fighting for, always.
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[And yet, as optimistic and bubbly as Kate normally is, she suddenly seems to deflate. She hides her face in her palms, scrubbing it roughly as she groans.
But a soft ring coming from upstairs makes her straighten up again.]
Your clothes are ready.
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[His gaze, as always, doesn't quite meet her eyes. It falls just short, drifting to the side, but his head is inclined in her direction to show she has his focus. That he hears the change in her tone.]
What is it?
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But Matt suprises her in a way that he shouldn't. Or rather, she shouldn't be surprised that he's here, in the present, showing he cares like he used to. Kate simply shakes her head, staring into those dark eyes that are far from meeting her gaze but still make a connection.]
Everything.
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[A light joke that he hopes might create enough ease for her to talk.]
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It feels like things keep getting worse and worse. And when things start feeling a little closer to normal, it all goes to shit again.
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[He gently rests a hand on Kate's back, lightly rubbing some warmth into it.]
I won't pretend that I'm not tired, too. That some things have gone to shit in a way that can't be fixed.
I'd just hate to think there's nothing good in your life, too. Some hope of a balance with all the rest.
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Her shoulder suddenly bumps up in what's almost a stubborn half-shrug.]
It's not like there's nothing good. Or like, I can't take it. I can totally take it. I'm just-- So fucking tired of things going wrong.
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He's quiet for a moment, letting Kate's words carry the weight they deserve. He won't discount what she's saying or feeling. He gets it, as much as he wants to make it easier for her to bear as a burden.]
I know you can take anything. As you friend though, I don't want you to just survive. I want to make something go right for you if I can. And I want you to know you're not alone when things do go wrong.
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