Kate had to force herself to keep her distance as she heard clearly how Matt was struggling in the other room, his body passing on the toll on how he was sure reaching his limit. There was only so much he could keep on taking, staying up without sleep and following that stupidy family motto before that rule was broken.
"You wouldn't have done the same thing in his position?"
It was a fair question at maybe an unfair moment. Both of them were too tired and doing everything they could to keep the city protected. They were pushing things to its limit to try and take Fisk down. And Kate was well aware that, even if Matt had moved in with Heather, things were not always easy between them.
Soon, wearing some joggers and a t-shirt that were a couple of sizes too big on her, Kate emerged from the bathroom. She had to admit something.
"You look so weird wearing those clothes with the mask on."
At least, her voice was softer now.
Coming to him with Betsy's lumberjack shirt in hand, Kate gently encourgaed him to take a seat down again. "I have something to cover you," she told him as her hands found his helmet. "Can I take this off?"
There was silence coming from Matt for a long moment at that question. Would he risk it all, the whole world, just to save one person?
Elektra.
"No," Matt finally said softly, but with the quiet certainty of one who had made a similar choice many years ago. "No, I wouldn't have done the same thing." He wouldn't harm innocents just to save someone he loved. He'd try and save everyone, he'd be there with his loved one as they died, but he could not condemn those who didn't deserve it. Even if he carried the guilt from that forever afterwards. There was a beat and he turned the question around on her. "Would you?"
"Weird is probably one of the nicer ways to put it." He figured it fell somewhere closer to ridiculous as he finished zipping up his pants and buttoning the shirt. His hand held onto Kate's arm for balance as he slowly lowered himself to sit on the floor. There were stools, but honestly, the floor felt more secure right now. Especially when he could lean his back against the wall. There was a small pause before he said, "Go ahead."
Reaching up he helped her remove his helmet. The left side of his face was swollen and bruising from the head trauma, some blood dried in his hair where the sheer force of the blow to his helmet had split his scalp beneath it. At least the bleeding from his head and nose were slowing down now, though a concussion seemed likely. The pit in his stomach grow as he admitted softly, "I can't sense anything, Kate. Nothing I should."
With a much more abstract idea of that imposibble decision, Kate kept quiet, unsure of what to answer. Would she let New York burn to keep Matt safe? Would she had let Fisk murder her mother if that had kept citizens safe? It felt like a wrong choice.
"I don't wanna sacrifice anyone."
It's probably an easy way out of a much more complicated question, but Kate sounds firm. Maybe, because in days like this one that seems like the reality they're heading to. Just look at him. She can't help it, hissing in empathy as she notices how Matt's head is swelling after the beating he's taken tonight.
She is not gonna let Matt sacrifice himself.
"Yeah, I... I kinda got the hint that something was wrong."
Cupping his face gently, Kate leaned in to have a closer look at his injuries, a careful thumb inspecting just how fresh was the blood that kept pouring from his injuries and nose. What is she supposed to say? A gentle, white and very positive lie to help him relax, promising that everything will be fine? Call him out for being this suicidal? The latter would feel wrong, specially now when they don't know what the hell is going with his powers. Would he get them back? This was probably just the stress.
Taking a deep, stuttering breath, Kate tries to prioritize in her mind the steps she needs to follow.
"Okay, I'm -- I'm gonna have to buy Betsy a new shirt." Grabbing it, she carefully started wiping the blood off Matt's face, the gears in her brain still turning, setting up a plan. "I'm gonna call Claire, okay? As her for tips, because we can't really leave this place yet."
They were still too close to the harbor and they had heard the sirens a little too close a couple of times while they headed to Melvin's place. Getting Matt to a hospital was off the table, any car crossing this area during curfew would catch attention. Getting to Claire's place wasn't much more of an option either. Maybe she could come instead somehow? But how?
"You can't keep going like this, Matt." His body itself was letting him know. Would losing his powers save his life? But what about the others? Losing Daredevil but saving Matt Murdock would be a tough blow for their rebellion. No, Kate couldn't pick an answer to that impossible question, sacrifice one for the other or for the good of the people. "This whole deal about not killing? That needs to include yourself too." Kate's voice had a slight cadence of a plea as she encouraged him to hold the shirt to his swollen injury while she grabbed her phone. "You can't keep going like this."
A look of soft, sad understanding came to Matt's unfocused gaze. He hoped a choice like he'd had to make with Elektra wasn't a choice that Kate would ever have to on her end. Matt hadn't killed the woman, but he hadn't saved her from death in the end, either. He'd merely stood with her as the magic set in motion found its resolution and the city survived. Of course Kate wanted to save everyone, instead. That was what heroes did. Matt hadn't felt very heroic back then about how that had ended.
There was a rueful look on Matt's face as he said, "You know, Foggy was the last person to say that to me." How Matt had to stop, slow down, not keep going like he was. Foggy had said it more than once over the years, one time even very similar to this one. He also knew it came from a place of concern, just like it was now with Kate. He didn't want to worry her, truly. That wasn't what a good leader should do. Or a good partner.
"You're right. I know. You're both right." At the end of the day Matt still didn't care all that much for his own welfare, but it did matter to him that he'd made a misstep tonight that could have put Kate in danger. His body did have a limit and it clearly had been reached. He winced a little to sit up a bit straighter. A huffed sigh escaped him. "All right. Call Claire. She's going to yell at me." He deserved it. A beat. "Do you think I could get some water, too? Or anything to drink." Whiskey would do him in right now but damned if it didn't sound good.
It was like a painful squeeze to the heart, hearing that Foggy had shared them same concerns. That Matt had always been this reckless and the people in his life kept witnessing it. But at the same time? It felt as if the most important person in Matt's life was backing her up on this.
For a moment, she simply looked at him. His eyes lost in a spot beyond her, almost zoned out but focused at the same time. A weariness, like she could almost feel the heavy burden he had willingly taken. All the bruises Matt had collected, way before they even met.
"Because... He really didn't want to lose you. You're too important in his life."
She doesn't want to lose him either.
At his sudden request, it was almost as if Matt had shaken her awake. "Right! Sorry, yeah, I'll - I'll ask Melving. Hang on, yeah? And hold the shirt to your head, you're still bleeding."
Getting on her feet again, Kate headed in the direction Melvin had disappeared, knocking at the door of his office before peeking in. "Hey. Hey, Melvin. Sorry to keep on bothering you. Could I have a glass of water? And -- You don't happen to have any ice, do you? I'm really so, so very sorry I keep asking for stuff."
Too important in Foggy's life, even if the man was gone. Matt could hear between the words, even if his hearing was at a normal human level right now. He knew he mattered to Kate, too. Just as she mattered to him. He gave a small nod, then wished he hadn't nodded, when she told him to hang on and hold the shirt to his head. He pressed the cloth to the wound, trying to ignore the throbbing pain and the ringing in his ears. Surely he wasn't so broken that he couldn't come back from this. He always bounced back.
It was his motto, wasn't it?
Matt tried to wrap that around him like a security blanket as Melvin got Kate water and ice. "Thank you, Melvin," he called out. "I appreciate it."
A pause, then Melvin said back, "Just keep watching out for Betsy."
"Will do."
"And her cat. She has a cat now."
Matt smiled a little tiredly. "Yeah? What's their name?"
"Thor. He thinks he's a god, too."
"Sounds like a cat." Matt coughed a little and winced. "Okay. Betsy and Thor. Can do."
With Kate kneeling by Matt's side, she helped directing his hand to the glass of water. She was all business, taking the shirt from his hand to wrap it around a good handful of ice. Warning him, she placed the cold bundle against his swollen face.
A smile of her own reached her lips as Melvin shared the conditions to their deal. She looked over her shoulder at the big guy. "I'll make sure he keeps his promise, Melvin." And Kate herself would probably send Betsy a fancy scratching post for Thor. "Betsy and her cat are lucky to have you."
Just like Matt was lucky to have Claire and his friends.
Satisfied with how his immediate needs were covered and after Melvin gave them privacy again, Kate stepped away to call Claire. She paced around the workshop, her attention hopping from each little thing, the saws an heavy machinery, the pieces of cloth and the chains. All while she muttered under her breath an eager plea: Please, please, please. Pick up, Claire.
Temple's tone wasn't exactly peachy. It had taken a few attempts before Claire called back, the nurse's phone buzzing non-stop on her pocket and distracting her from her work at the E.R. This better be a real emergency, Claire warned. It clearly was, she realized as Kate explained what had happened, to which Claire had responded with a frustrated sigh. Soon, she was giving very clear instructions.
"No, he... He looks awake enough. We're already applying ice." As Claire kept listing what Kate could do to help, the young archer nodded. "I'll try and get something. He is sitting down now. No... Okay. I'll keep an eye on him, don't worry."
But there was a far bigger worry now. One she could get away with if she lowered her voice and walked at the other corner of the workshop. Out of Matt's current hearing range.
He knew Claire wouldn't be happy. Not only was she pulling double duty, but she was having to patch up more vigilantes than normal these days. Matt hated that he was adding to her place once more. The very least he could do for Kate and Claire right now was to be a good patient. He drank the water, saying thank you, and held the ice against his head when asked. His heart quickened when Kate went out of range. He heard her voice taper off, and her footsteps as well. Logically he knew she was safe and fine in the warehouse, he wasn't hearing any screaming. Yet without his senses, he felt more comfortable when she was close enough to him. He'd taken for granted that he could hear her within a five mile radius. Now just going to the next room left him feeling alone.
He couldn't hear Melvin. He couldn't hear his city.
Sometimes Matt felt overwhelmed by his powers, but at moments like this, he missed the quiet thrum of sensory data that always was a background noise to his life.
No. He wasn't going to call out for Kate. If she stepped away, she'd done it for a reason. He sat and waited, spilling a little water as he reached for it, then drinking again. Being thirsty after a fight and injury always was what happened. He only drank half of the glass, saving the rest for Kate, since she'd been out there fighting, too. He thought about standing up and trying to get her a glass of her own, but he knew that would annoy her more than she'd be grateful right now.
Claire had been at the loss too, suddenly quieter, caught up in her own worries. It could be due to brain damage but they couldn't rule our stress. For now, until they could get out of there and get somewhere safe, the best Matt could do was rest. But Kate needed to keep an eye on him for any new symptoms. Claire would be waiting for updates.
Thanking her, Kate found herself feeling helpless. Hiding her face in her hands for a moment, she held a breath, squeezed her eyes tighly as she fought the need to let out a scream.
Calm down, Kate. Everything is on your hands now. You have this.
"I have this. I have this."
Aware of her own wet ponytail, she grabbed the end of it and pulled it up in a tight bun. That would keep her borrowed clothes a little drier, at least. She grabbed the towel Melvin had handed them and, kneeling by Matt's side, carefully stroked his hair dry.
"Claire says that you might have a concussion. But, since you haven't passed out or vomited or anything, you're probably safe." With her free hand, she started rubbing at his arm. "I need to keep you comfortable and warm." Was going to the hospital even an option for them now? Fisk had pulled a murder attempt the last time Matt had been bed-ridden. Kate didn't exactly feel safe taking him to one.
"My mom is friends with a couple of really big names in medicine. I'm not saying I don't trust Claire," she clarified. "But they might know someone that specialized on hearing issues. I'll check with them today, okay? See if they have private practices. Order freaking equipment if they need it and have it sent home if I have to."
"The last time this happened, my powers just came back when the swelling in my brain went down." A beat. "I kind of just sat on my apartment floor until then." Even back then he hadn't felt safe going to a hospital. It had made Matt Murdock Sense to just simply wait things out and hope it got better. It had worked, though? "Before we start dragging in other doctors, maybe see if that happens again this time?" How long had he been without powers then? A day? Two? What would happen if they never came back even after the swelling went down?
A spasm of pain radiating out from where his old gunshot wound was made him arch his back, a groan escaping him that ended in a cough. Instinctively he leaned into Kate's soothing touch, craving the physical affection until the spasm went away. Somehow in the middle of that his hand had found hers.
Giving her hand a little squeeze, he tried to smile weakly at her. "Let me know if your butt goes numb sitting on the floor," he joked. "Maybe there's a cushion or something we can borrow while we're at it." A beat. "And I saved you half the water. You should drink it. I know you're wearing enough water, but you're still probably dehydrated, too."
Kate grew silent. They had options here, they had a chance of tackling this before some irreparable damage was done! Just like her father, Derek Bishop's daughter had never been good at sitting things out when she needed answers. Waiting for danger to pass? That she could do, time had taught her that sometimes there was no alternative. But as the fear of making a huge mistake crept up on her, she realized she had to accept Matt's wishes.
"Okay. We can wait and--"
As a violent cough took over Matt, Kate's hand instantly came to his chest as she froze, unsure of how her touch might make matters worse. But Matt's handed reached for hers. Not to stop her. Because he needed her here.
She stroked his knuckle with her thumb, silently being there for him and breathing out a chuckle as he joked about her butt going numb. He was right. It probably would be soon, but she didn't admit it outloud. "I'm not thirsty, Matt," not terribly so, anyway. She feared he needed it more than she did. She could always get more water from the sink's bathroom later once she really needed a drink. "Give me a second, yeah? I wanna have a look around." For a cushion. Or anything to make him more comrtable. Just as Claire had adviced.
With only a little hesitation, she pulled their joined hands up to kiss the back of Matt's, promising she'd be back soon.
It was only dawning on her now that, without his enhanced senses, Matt's disability had suddenly made his world smaller. She remembered how he had asked her to keep talking back when they were on the run. At the moment, she had been a guide. Right now, she didn't want him to feel alone.
"So, how many hours do you think you'll sleep after this? A full day? I once slept like fourteen hours in one go," she told him as she started looking around Melvin's working place. Sure, she could just ask him, but it felt a little wrong to bother the poor guy again. She wouldn't blame him if they finally got on his nevers and he kicked them out.
"Aha!"
It wasn't a blanket, but all that fabric would sure do a good job at keeping Matt a littler warmer. And if she was honest? Kate could do with an improvised blanket as well. Because even though Betsy's clothes were great, she wishes she'd had a spare shirt to wear, aside from the one they had used to put some ice on Matt's face.
Pulling on the fabric, Kate had expected to find underneath more of the boxes scattered around the place. But this? She had absolutely hit jackpot!
After slapping the old leather a bit to get the dust off it, Kate dragged the big bean bag to where Matt waited. "I found something way better than a cushion," she stated as she set it near their wall. After asking if he was okay to move, she helped him up and guided him down to take a seat. "Fair warning, you might feel a little dip."
She talked to him this time. Matt relaxed more at hearing her voice, the sound of it mattering more than what they were saying. "I'm not sure. Does 3 hours count as a full night's sleep?" He knew it didn't. "What happened that you slept for fourteen hours?" he asked curiously. Not that it was unheard of, but he wanted to know what had happened to inspire that much slumber. "When I had the flu and bronchitis, I probably slept that much once I made it home." That had been another questionable night of being Daredevil some years ago. Another time his powers hadn't been totally gone but were on the fritz, going in and out. He'd nearly gotten beaten by an easy opponent. Then though he'd only put himself at risk.
He did have more people to think about now.
Matt huffed out a little sigh but accepted when Kate wouldn't take the water. He drank it then himself, greedily sucking it down and feeling better for it. He'd mentioned the cushion for her sake though, so when she tried to get him to sit on the beanbag chair and be covered with the fabric, his own stubbornness rose to the surface. He shifted, moving to the edge of the beanbag as best he could and said, "Either this cushion and the fabric is big enough for us to share, or I'm not using either one." She couldn't really expect him to rest when she was sitting on a hard ground while cold. He remembered her teeth chattering, it seemed as though she got cold more easily than he did, anyway. He patted the beanbag next to him. Yes, it would leave them smooshed together, but it wasn't inappropriate. What was the alternative? "C'mon. Either there's something else for you to rest on or you're joining me. Or nobody is using it."
"Finals overlapping with a fencing tournament." There wasn't much of a need to elaborate, because having gone to law school Matt was sure well aware that finals were enough to guarantee several nights of sleep deprivation.
Proud as she had been of her finding, Kate's jaw dropped as she watched Matt wiggle to the side, worrying that all that weight shifting would make him fall on his ass off the beanbag. "Okay, okay! Just stop! You're gonna hurt yourself, be careful."
She wouldn't admit it outloud, but she was truly thankful that Matt decided to share. Sure, changing her clothes had come in handy, but she was still freezing her ass. She could feel it even in how tense her body felt, almost as if it was putting barriers to protect the little heat it had recovered.
Careful, she held onto the leathery bumps and lowered herself, letting the dip pull her to the center of the bag and against Matt's body. As he set the fabric over their bodies, Kate seemed to shrink against him, her whole body suddenly shaking as she rubbed her legs together, her fists tucked against her collarbone. The leather felt cold against her skin and she knew her body needed to grow used to this new warmth that was embracing her.
Matt gave a slightly smug smile at having won the argument. He felt Kate slink down to sit next to him, their combined weighs making them lean into one another beneath the bean bag's cushion. He folded the fabric over them, making sure she was completely covered. Even without his powers he could feel how tense her body was. On instinct he folded an arm around her, holding her close. He rubbed his hand up and down her arm to try and help warm her. It felt natural to Matt to try and take care of her even now. It was a position that he enjoyed, that came to him without a second thought. He tried to absorb her coldness and share his heat with her, what heat there was.
"So, no Polar Bear or Penguin challenge?" he joked at her. A part of him had wanted to try those, mostly because Matt had a hard time hearing about a challenge and not wanting to complete it. It hadn't been something he'd trained and traveled for, though. Yet. "Nightswimming is a great song, though. Maybe just make it in a heated pool next time." He was talking mostly as a distraction for her and himself from the stress and anxiety of the situation and the physical discomfort they were in.
He hummed for a moment then said quietly, "You know, meditation can also help raise body temperature. I don't think either of us are in a state to do it right, but it can be a good healing tool." One of those practices that Matt had learned from Stick, who'd no doubt been trained in it by the Chaste.
She had to admit it. As terrible as she felt for how she sucked taking the protector role, it felt so good to finally be able to have Matt taking care of her instead. Looking after each other. As he pulled her into an embrace, most of her worries about an innapropiate closeness were something she finally allowed herself to ignore. Kate wrapped an arm around Matt's chest and nuzzled it, finding it strange how those clothes didn't smell at all like him.
But it all felt so good.
Little by little, their joined body heat grew stronger and warmer, sheltered under that improvised blanket. Kate stopped shaking, the goosebumps on her arms disappearing almost as if Matt had stroked them away.
"I'll gladly be a penguin in a hot t-tub," she offered, still shaking lightly in random short outbursts. "You ever tried one? There's one at the pool in mom's place. My friends always made such a big deal about it," she shared, a smile reaching her lips at the memory. It was a much more simpler time.
"You've mentioned meditation before." How that had always helped him after a fight, after the rough times. "I've tried a few guided ones on YouTube since you told me about it. But I doubt that's what you're talking about."
"I've been in a hot tub before," Matt confirmed, debating whether he should share the details before admitting, "I broke into a house that had one. The girl I was with at the time and I used it." He and Elektra really had been terrible influences on one another during those college days. "It was a dumb, shitty thing to do." Using their abilities to do whatever they wanted, thinking nothing was really hurt by their antics. "The hot tub was nice, though. I'll have to try it again someday. Legally." Well, Kate had wanted to know about his wild youth. He supposed there had been more moments to it than he'd initially remembered. He didn't like the entitled person he'd been back then, and Foggy had always resented Elektra because of encouraging Matt to act that way. Not that it was her fault. He'd made his own choices. They both just tended to make terrible ones when together.
He kept rubbing her arm and back to warm her, pausing only when a spasm of pain overtook him. He'd hold his breath in those moments, counting, until the moment passed. Then he'd resume his trying to keep her warm. Eventually his eyes started to feel heavy, his hand slowing but stubbornly not stopping.
"No, not quite the same. I could show you sometime. A few lessons. See if you like it. Controlling your breathing and body temperature, focusing in on areas that need energy to heal. Stick was big on it. He was big on control in general." A spartan lifestyle, rough edges that all cut. A living weapon. Elektra had taken to those lessons much better than Matt had, which was why she'd ended up being his pupil longer. In a rare moment of what Matt now knew was compassion as much as it had been abandonment, Stick had left Matt behind before initiating him into the Chaste with a kill.
"No way!" At Matt's confession, Kate lifted her head off the spot between his chest and shoulder, looking at his face as if this was the very first time she saw his true colors. "You?" The fact that a girl had been involved was hardly shocking, but Kate was thankful that she had not shared a much deeper opinion on his little hot tub adventure before Matt passed judgement on his younger self. Because, to be honest? Kate felt that was far from a dumb or shitty thing. It sounded like a pretty fun plan.
Just as Kate started to settle back down, tempted to ask him to elaborate more on these crazy adventures with that ex of his, she noticed Matt's body became tense. His gaze, was focused on an invisible point, like he was waiting for something to pass. Kate carefully tried to pull her weight off him, off his chest, hoping that would help him with his damaged lungs.
But even as she tried to put distance between them for his own good, Matt always seemed to pull her right back in.
With gentle gestures of love and care, he held her close, her heart claiming a spot near his. Kate understood that, regardless of what stayed the same between them or what could possibly change, she was there for good. There to stay. To be lured back in as long as they shared the same city, same lifetime.
"You totally check the teacher vibe," she pointed out playfully. Adjusting their cover, the fabric practically reached her chin, and so she tried her best to cover Matt's own chest, his collar too. Keep him as warm as he did with her. Taking good care of Matt. "You're gonna have to put patches on the elbows of your jackets now."
Her fingertips found his beard, the dry crust of blood. Gently, she tried wiping it off him, noticing how he was struggling to keep his eyes open.
"Yes way," Matt confirmed wryly. "I'm a lot more respectful of other people's property these days." Well. "When I'm not breaking in to help protect someone." He didn't break into houses now just for the selfish fun of it. There was a distinction, even if it wasn't always necessarily a lawful one. He knew there were always risks and that they weren't worth taking for a bit of fun. He could just imagine though the threat that someone might bring with them if they had abilities and lacked a moral compass, if they did put their own whims above all else. It mattered so much to have influences that told people when they were veering down the wrong path.
He made a soft noise as she tucked him in better, as she cleaned his face, making sure that he was warm, too. Between the leather, the beanbag, and Kate's warm weight against him with her heart beating close, he was quickly being dragged into slumber. "M'fine," he mumbled, but he didn't last much longer before his eyes fell closed and his hand stilled around her. "Got you." The words slurred out of him with a quiet protectiveness before his breathing evened out and he fell into a much needed sleep. Or had he meant he was fine because he had her looking out for him?
How much time passed he wasn't entirely certain. It wasn't as if he could sense the light, as if he could hear the sounds outside. He jolted a little when he was awake, that disoriented feeling that came when one woke up in a strange place. For a moment he forgot he didn't have his senses and that sent him into a panic. He squirmed, heart beating fast, "K-" wait. Slowly what happened last night came back to him. It was with a sinking heart that he realized he still didn't have his powers back.
Maybe it hadn't been that long. Just a few hours.
He could still be fine.
His body told him that he needed the bathroom. He wasn't sure if he'd woken Kate or not, but in case he hadn't, Matt tried to get up sneakily. Given his head injury, his aching body, and his lack of powers, the jury was out on how well he was managing trying to stand up while sharing a bean bag without bothering the person next to him.
Later, Kate would realize that this had been the best sleep she had enjoyed in a long time. Because even though the place was dusty and in the morning whatever tv show Melvin had been watching on cell phone and his laughter had woken her up, sleep had lured Kate back in. It was like resting in a nest, one in which Kate had been lulled back into resting by a coccoon of warmth and strong arms that held her close. She had shifted, one of her legs now tucked between Matt's and her forehead resting againts his neck. One of her arms stretched across his chest and protectively almost wrapped around his head.
But maybe it was those words that did the trick. She couldn't remember hearing something that made things as right as hearing those last words before he fell asleep.
Like a promise that everything would work out.
"Hmmmm." Kate frowned, hiding her face against his shoulder as everything shifted. She was the kind of morning person that refused to be a morning person, always striving for at least an extra half an hour in bed.
But sleeping on a bean bag was nothing like a mattress and, when Matt tried to get off it, Kate practically rolled into the empty spot, face-first.
"Shit." Unsurprisingly, he hadn't been that stealthy. Rather than actually standing up, all he managed to do was roll his way off the bean bag. He knelt beside it, putting the trip to the bathroom on hold as he turned to face the beanbag and Kate's now crumpled form on it. Still blind but wanting to help, Matt's hands reached out fumblingly to feel for her and try to help her in a better position. He didn't realize that his hands initially fell on her ass. It took a moment to realize. "Wh-sorry! I'm sorry!" He felt upwards more to find her hair and face, then her shoulders that he could try and awkwardly help to turn her around in the sunken bean bag. His face was a little flushed at that mistake. "I was trying not to wake you."
If the sudden drop onto the middle of the beanbag had not been enough to wake Kate up, that sudden hand groping her ass definitely did the trick. She froze, completely shocked as she fought the moving sands-like contraption that was this seat, propping herself up while Matt clumsily helped her turn around.
She had never seen a more mortified man in her entire life.
Hearing Kate laugh, Matt first huffed out a breath and tried to say it wasn't funny, but the ridiculousness of the situation caught up with him. The huff ended in a laugh of his own as he sat back on his heels. At least she was taking it in good spirits and wasn't offended by his unintentional touching. He really hadn't been trying to grope her, but it seemed Kate knew that about him. He seemed more embarrassed than she was about it. "Okay, okay. Not my finest moment." He was sure she wouldn't let him forget about it, either. His muscles still felt sore and his head still hurt, but there wasn't the bone crushing weariness that had weighed down his body the day before, nor the intense pain in the gunshot wound area. The side of his face and head was still swollen though, if not quite as bad.
His brow furrowed, straining to regain his senses, but to no avail yet. There was a momentary look of dejection on his face before he focused in on Kate. "How are you feeling?" He very carefully reached out to grab the blanket, trying to ensure it covered her. "Still cold?"
"Sorry, I'm not sorry. If I say it's funny then you have to accept that it was hilarious." Half drapping herself on the side of the beanbag now that she felt more in control of it, Kate's smile grew impossibly wide as she watched Matt finally joining in and laughing along.
He looked much better. Less weary, at least. And that was a lot to say.
"Im fine, actually. This thing was warmer than I expected." However, as much as her day had started in such high spirits, his clumsy hands spoke for themselves. Matt still couldn't hear any better than she did. "Honestly, crazy as it sounds, it was the best sleep I've had in ages."
Maybe, like finding a home, it's the people you share with and not the place what does the trick.
He did like the sound of her laughter. Even if he couldn't hear all the nuances in it like he usually did, it was still a sweet sound to his ears. His smile turned a little tender when hearing it even as she teased him. "Yeah, yeah, laugh away." Please, do keep laughing. It was nice.
He looked relieved at hearing she was all right. "Glad to hear it. I feel a lot better as well." Not great, but better. He'd take it. He hoped that meant he was on the road to recovery. "I didn't miss a mattress and silk sheets last night. I was out like a light, too." Their bodies had clearly needed the rest. "I can't remember the last time I slept like that." Certainly not since Fisk had risen to power. Maybe not since Foggy had died.
"I was going to the bathroom," he confessed, a flawed plan from the start. He couldn't find it on his own, even if he could reach his walking stick. He tried to get to his feet, but a dizzy spell made him stumble and reach for the wall until it passed. A beat. "Do you know what time it is? We should probably be heading out soon." Not that he could easily go back to Heather's like this. Oh, he knew his way around her apartment, but to explain how he looked? He'd need a story for it.
"We seriously need a break," Kate stated. Unlike other times when she had sternly told him that he needed to take things easier, this time there was a gentle certainity in her voice. Like a kind of acceptance and knowing that this time Matt couldn't deny it.
Specially not in this state.
Watching him barely be able to stand on his feet, Kate pushed off herself the fabric they had shared as a blanket. She rushed to her feet, coming to Matt and grabbing hold of his forearm as her other hand found his lower back. It was so strange. How many times has she pretended to assist him? Now that it all had become real, she was unsure if she could do a good job at it.
"No idea. But let me help you to the bathroom and I'll check, yeah?"
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Date: 2025-05-11 04:00 pm (UTC)"You wouldn't have done the same thing in his position?"
It was a fair question at maybe an unfair moment. Both of them were too tired and doing everything they could to keep the city protected. They were pushing things to its limit to try and take Fisk down. And Kate was well aware that, even if Matt had moved in with Heather, things were not always easy between them.
Soon, wearing some joggers and a t-shirt that were a couple of sizes too big on her, Kate emerged from the bathroom. She had to admit something.
"You look so weird wearing those clothes with the mask on."
At least, her voice was softer now.
Coming to him with Betsy's lumberjack shirt in hand, Kate gently encourgaed him to take a seat down again. "I have something to cover you," she told him as her hands found his helmet. "Can I take this off?"
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Date: 2025-05-11 04:24 pm (UTC)Elektra.
"No," Matt finally said softly, but with the quiet certainty of one who had made a similar choice many years ago. "No, I wouldn't have done the same thing." He wouldn't harm innocents just to save someone he loved. He'd try and save everyone, he'd be there with his loved one as they died, but he could not condemn those who didn't deserve it. Even if he carried the guilt from that forever afterwards. There was a beat and he turned the question around on her. "Would you?"
"Weird is probably one of the nicer ways to put it." He figured it fell somewhere closer to ridiculous as he finished zipping up his pants and buttoning the shirt. His hand held onto Kate's arm for balance as he slowly lowered himself to sit on the floor. There were stools, but honestly, the floor felt more secure right now. Especially when he could lean his back against the wall. There was a small pause before he said, "Go ahead."
Reaching up he helped her remove his helmet. The left side of his face was swollen and bruising from the head trauma, some blood dried in his hair where the sheer force of the blow to his helmet had split his scalp beneath it. At least the bleeding from his head and nose were slowing down now, though a concussion seemed likely. The pit in his stomach grow as he admitted softly, "I can't sense anything, Kate. Nothing I should."
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Date: 2025-05-12 10:03 am (UTC)"I don't wanna sacrifice anyone."
It's probably an easy way out of a much more complicated question, but Kate sounds firm. Maybe, because in days like this one that seems like the reality they're heading to. Just look at him. She can't help it, hissing in empathy as she notices how Matt's head is swelling after the beating he's taken tonight.
She is not gonna let Matt sacrifice himself.
"Yeah, I... I kinda got the hint that something was wrong."
Cupping his face gently, Kate leaned in to have a closer look at his injuries, a careful thumb inspecting just how fresh was the blood that kept pouring from his injuries and nose. What is she supposed to say? A gentle, white and very positive lie to help him relax, promising that everything will be fine? Call him out for being this suicidal? The latter would feel wrong, specially now when they don't know what the hell is going with his powers. Would he get them back? This was probably just the stress.
Taking a deep, stuttering breath, Kate tries to prioritize in her mind the steps she needs to follow.
"Okay, I'm -- I'm gonna have to buy Betsy a new shirt." Grabbing it, she carefully started wiping the blood off Matt's face, the gears in her brain still turning, setting up a plan. "I'm gonna call Claire, okay? As her for tips, because we can't really leave this place yet."
They were still too close to the harbor and they had heard the sirens a little too close a couple of times while they headed to Melvin's place. Getting Matt to a hospital was off the table, any car crossing this area during curfew would catch attention. Getting to Claire's place wasn't much more of an option either. Maybe she could come instead somehow? But how?
"You can't keep going like this, Matt." His body itself was letting him know. Would losing his powers save his life? But what about the others? Losing Daredevil but saving Matt Murdock would be a tough blow for their rebellion. No, Kate couldn't pick an answer to that impossible question, sacrifice one for the other or for the good of the people. "This whole deal about not killing? That needs to include yourself too." Kate's voice had a slight cadence of a plea as she encouraged him to hold the shirt to his swollen injury while she grabbed her phone. "You can't keep going like this."
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Date: 2025-05-12 12:09 pm (UTC)There was a rueful look on Matt's face as he said, "You know, Foggy was the last person to say that to me." How Matt had to stop, slow down, not keep going like he was. Foggy had said it more than once over the years, one time even very similar to this one. He also knew it came from a place of concern, just like it was now with Kate. He didn't want to worry her, truly. That wasn't what a good leader should do. Or a good partner.
"You're right. I know. You're both right." At the end of the day Matt still didn't care all that much for his own welfare, but it did matter to him that he'd made a misstep tonight that could have put Kate in danger. His body did have a limit and it clearly had been reached. He winced a little to sit up a bit straighter. A huffed sigh escaped him. "All right. Call Claire. She's going to yell at me." He deserved it. A beat. "Do you think I could get some water, too? Or anything to drink." Whiskey would do him in right now but damned if it didn't sound good.
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Date: 2025-05-12 12:33 pm (UTC)For a moment, she simply looked at him. His eyes lost in a spot beyond her, almost zoned out but focused at the same time. A weariness, like she could almost feel the heavy burden he had willingly taken. All the bruises Matt had collected, way before they even met.
"Because... He really didn't want to lose you. You're too important in his life."
She doesn't want to lose him either.
At his sudden request, it was almost as if Matt had shaken her awake. "Right! Sorry, yeah, I'll - I'll ask Melving. Hang on, yeah? And hold the shirt to your head, you're still bleeding."
Getting on her feet again, Kate headed in the direction Melvin had disappeared, knocking at the door of his office before peeking in. "Hey. Hey, Melvin. Sorry to keep on bothering you. Could I have a glass of water? And -- You don't happen to have any ice, do you? I'm really so, so very sorry I keep asking for stuff."
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Date: 2025-05-12 01:14 pm (UTC)It was his motto, wasn't it?
Matt tried to wrap that around him like a security blanket as Melvin got Kate water and ice. "Thank you, Melvin," he called out. "I appreciate it."
A pause, then Melvin said back, "Just keep watching out for Betsy."
"Will do."
"And her cat. She has a cat now."
Matt smiled a little tiredly. "Yeah? What's their name?"
"Thor. He thinks he's a god, too."
"Sounds like a cat." Matt coughed a little and winced. "Okay. Betsy and Thor. Can do."
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Date: 2025-05-12 02:00 pm (UTC)A smile of her own reached her lips as Melvin shared the conditions to their deal. She looked over her shoulder at the big guy. "I'll make sure he keeps his promise, Melvin." And Kate herself would probably send Betsy a fancy scratching post for Thor. "Betsy and her cat are lucky to have you."
Just like Matt was lucky to have Claire and his friends.
Satisfied with how his immediate needs were covered and after Melvin gave them privacy again, Kate stepped away to call Claire. She paced around the workshop, her attention hopping from each little thing, the saws an heavy machinery, the pieces of cloth and the chains. All while she muttered under her breath an eager plea: Please, please, please. Pick up, Claire.
Temple's tone wasn't exactly peachy. It had taken a few attempts before Claire called back, the nurse's phone buzzing non-stop on her pocket and distracting her from her work at the E.R. This better be a real emergency, Claire warned. It clearly was, she realized as Kate explained what had happened, to which Claire had responded with a frustrated sigh. Soon, she was giving very clear instructions.
"No, he... He looks awake enough. We're already applying ice." As Claire kept listing what Kate could do to help, the young archer nodded. "I'll try and get something. He is sitting down now. No... Okay. I'll keep an eye on him, don't worry."
But there was a far bigger worry now. One she could get away with if she lowered her voice and walked at the other corner of the workshop. Out of Matt's current hearing range.
"He's... Blinder than usual. Know what I mean?"
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Date: 2025-05-12 02:16 pm (UTC)He couldn't hear Melvin. He couldn't hear his city.
Sometimes Matt felt overwhelmed by his powers, but at moments like this, he missed the quiet thrum of sensory data that always was a background noise to his life.
No. He wasn't going to call out for Kate. If she stepped away, she'd done it for a reason. He sat and waited, spilling a little water as he reached for it, then drinking again. Being thirsty after a fight and injury always was what happened. He only drank half of the glass, saving the rest for Kate, since she'd been out there fighting, too. He thought about standing up and trying to get her a glass of her own, but he knew that would annoy her more than she'd be grateful right now.
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Date: 2025-05-12 02:40 pm (UTC)Thanking her, Kate found herself feeling helpless. Hiding her face in her hands for a moment, she held a breath, squeezed her eyes tighly as she fought the need to let out a scream.
Calm down, Kate. Everything is on your hands now. You have this.
"I have this. I have this."
Aware of her own wet ponytail, she grabbed the end of it and pulled it up in a tight bun. That would keep her borrowed clothes a little drier, at least. She grabbed the towel Melvin had handed them and, kneeling by Matt's side, carefully stroked his hair dry.
"Claire says that you might have a concussion. But, since you haven't passed out or vomited or anything, you're probably safe." With her free hand, she started rubbing at his arm. "I need to keep you comfortable and warm." Was going to the hospital even an option for them now? Fisk had pulled a murder attempt the last time Matt had been bed-ridden. Kate didn't exactly feel safe taking him to one.
"My mom is friends with a couple of really big names in medicine. I'm not saying I don't trust Claire," she clarified. "But they might know someone that specialized on hearing issues. I'll check with them today, okay? See if they have private practices. Order freaking equipment if they need it and have it sent home if I have to."
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Date: 2025-05-12 03:03 pm (UTC)A spasm of pain radiating out from where his old gunshot wound was made him arch his back, a groan escaping him that ended in a cough. Instinctively he leaned into Kate's soothing touch, craving the physical affection until the spasm went away. Somehow in the middle of that his hand had found hers.
Giving her hand a little squeeze, he tried to smile weakly at her. "Let me know if your butt goes numb sitting on the floor," he joked. "Maybe there's a cushion or something we can borrow while we're at it." A beat. "And I saved you half the water. You should drink it. I know you're wearing enough water, but you're still probably dehydrated, too."
no subject
Date: 2025-05-12 03:31 pm (UTC)"Okay. We can wait and--"
As a violent cough took over Matt, Kate's hand instantly came to his chest as she froze, unsure of how her touch might make matters worse. But Matt's handed reached for hers. Not to stop her. Because he needed her here.
She stroked his knuckle with her thumb, silently being there for him and breathing out a chuckle as he joked about her butt going numb. He was right. It probably would be soon, but she didn't admit it outloud. "I'm not thirsty, Matt," not terribly so, anyway. She feared he needed it more than she did. She could always get more water from the sink's bathroom later once she really needed a drink. "Give me a second, yeah? I wanna have a look around." For a cushion. Or anything to make him more comrtable. Just as Claire had adviced.
With only a little hesitation, she pulled their joined hands up to kiss the back of Matt's, promising she'd be back soon.
It was only dawning on her now that, without his enhanced senses, Matt's disability had suddenly made his world smaller. She remembered how he had asked her to keep talking back when they were on the run. At the moment, she had been a guide. Right now, she didn't want him to feel alone.
"So, how many hours do you think you'll sleep after this? A full day? I once slept like fourteen hours in one go," she told him as she started looking around Melvin's working place. Sure, she could just ask him, but it felt a little wrong to bother the poor guy again. She wouldn't blame him if they finally got on his nevers and he kicked them out.
"Aha!"
It wasn't a blanket, but all that fabric would sure do a good job at keeping Matt a littler warmer. And if she was honest? Kate could do with an improvised blanket as well. Because even though Betsy's clothes were great, she wishes she'd had a spare shirt to wear, aside from the one they had used to put some ice on Matt's face.
Pulling on the fabric, Kate had expected to find underneath more of the boxes scattered around the place. But this? She had absolutely hit jackpot!
After slapping the old leather a bit to get the dust off it, Kate dragged the big bean bag to where Matt waited. "I found something way better than a cushion," she stated as she set it near their wall. After asking if he was okay to move, she helped him up and guided him down to take a seat. "Fair warning, you might feel a little dip."
no subject
Date: 2025-05-12 03:54 pm (UTC)He did have more people to think about now.
Matt huffed out a little sigh but accepted when Kate wouldn't take the water. He drank it then himself, greedily sucking it down and feeling better for it. He'd mentioned the cushion for her sake though, so when she tried to get him to sit on the beanbag chair and be covered with the fabric, his own stubbornness rose to the surface. He shifted, moving to the edge of the beanbag as best he could and said, "Either this cushion and the fabric is big enough for us to share, or I'm not using either one." She couldn't really expect him to rest when she was sitting on a hard ground while cold. He remembered her teeth chattering, it seemed as though she got cold more easily than he did, anyway. He patted the beanbag next to him. Yes, it would leave them smooshed together, but it wasn't inappropriate. What was the alternative? "C'mon. Either there's something else for you to rest on or you're joining me. Or nobody is using it."
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Date: 2025-05-12 04:13 pm (UTC)Proud as she had been of her finding, Kate's jaw dropped as she watched Matt wiggle to the side, worrying that all that weight shifting would make him fall on his ass off the beanbag. "Okay, okay! Just stop! You're gonna hurt yourself, be careful."
She wouldn't admit it outloud, but she was truly thankful that Matt decided to share. Sure, changing her clothes had come in handy, but she was still freezing her ass. She could feel it even in how tense her body felt, almost as if it was putting barriers to protect the little heat it had recovered.
Careful, she held onto the leathery bumps and lowered herself, letting the dip pull her to the center of the bag and against Matt's body. As he set the fabric over their bodies, Kate seemed to shrink against him, her whole body suddenly shaking as she rubbed her legs together, her fists tucked against her collarbone. The leather felt cold against her skin and she knew her body needed to grow used to this new warmth that was embracing her.
"F-f-fuck, I'm never swimming at night ag-again."
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Date: 2025-05-12 04:28 pm (UTC)"So, no Polar Bear or Penguin challenge?" he joked at her. A part of him had wanted to try those, mostly because Matt had a hard time hearing about a challenge and not wanting to complete it. It hadn't been something he'd trained and traveled for, though. Yet. "Nightswimming is a great song, though. Maybe just make it in a heated pool next time." He was talking mostly as a distraction for her and himself from the stress and anxiety of the situation and the physical discomfort they were in.
He hummed for a moment then said quietly, "You know, meditation can also help raise body temperature. I don't think either of us are in a state to do it right, but it can be a good healing tool." One of those practices that Matt had learned from Stick, who'd no doubt been trained in it by the Chaste.
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Date: 2025-05-12 05:05 pm (UTC)But it all felt so good.
Little by little, their joined body heat grew stronger and warmer, sheltered under that improvised blanket. Kate stopped shaking, the goosebumps on her arms disappearing almost as if Matt had stroked them away.
"I'll gladly be a penguin in a hot t-tub," she offered, still shaking lightly in random short outbursts. "You ever tried one? There's one at the pool in mom's place. My friends always made such a big deal about it," she shared, a smile reaching her lips at the memory. It was a much more simpler time.
"You've mentioned meditation before." How that had always helped him after a fight, after the rough times. "I've tried a few guided ones on YouTube since you told me about it. But I doubt that's what you're talking about."
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Date: 2025-05-12 05:20 pm (UTC)He kept rubbing her arm and back to warm her, pausing only when a spasm of pain overtook him. He'd hold his breath in those moments, counting, until the moment passed. Then he'd resume his trying to keep her warm. Eventually his eyes started to feel heavy, his hand slowing but stubbornly not stopping.
"No, not quite the same. I could show you sometime. A few lessons. See if you like it. Controlling your breathing and body temperature, focusing in on areas that need energy to heal. Stick was big on it. He was big on control in general." A spartan lifestyle, rough edges that all cut. A living weapon. Elektra had taken to those lessons much better than Matt had, which was why she'd ended up being his pupil longer. In a rare moment of what Matt now knew was compassion as much as it had been abandonment, Stick had left Matt behind before initiating him into the Chaste with a kill.
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Date: 2025-05-12 06:06 pm (UTC)Just as Kate started to settle back down, tempted to ask him to elaborate more on these crazy adventures with that ex of his, she noticed Matt's body became tense. His gaze, was focused on an invisible point, like he was waiting for something to pass. Kate carefully tried to pull her weight off him, off his chest, hoping that would help him with his damaged lungs.
But even as she tried to put distance between them for his own good, Matt always seemed to pull her right back in.
With gentle gestures of love and care, he held her close, her heart claiming a spot near his. Kate understood that, regardless of what stayed the same between them or what could possibly change, she was there for good. There to stay. To be lured back in as long as they shared the same city, same lifetime.
"You totally check the teacher vibe," she pointed out playfully. Adjusting their cover, the fabric practically reached her chin, and so she tried her best to cover Matt's own chest, his collar too. Keep him as warm as he did with her. Taking good care of Matt. "You're gonna have to put patches on the elbows of your jackets now."
Her fingertips found his beard, the dry crust of blood. Gently, she tried wiping it off him, noticing how he was struggling to keep his eyes open.
"We should rest."
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Date: 2025-05-12 06:25 pm (UTC)He made a soft noise as she tucked him in better, as she cleaned his face, making sure that he was warm, too. Between the leather, the beanbag, and Kate's warm weight against him with her heart beating close, he was quickly being dragged into slumber. "M'fine," he mumbled, but he didn't last much longer before his eyes fell closed and his hand stilled around her. "Got you." The words slurred out of him with a quiet protectiveness before his breathing evened out and he fell into a much needed sleep. Or had he meant he was fine because he had her looking out for him?
How much time passed he wasn't entirely certain. It wasn't as if he could sense the light, as if he could hear the sounds outside. He jolted a little when he was awake, that disoriented feeling that came when one woke up in a strange place. For a moment he forgot he didn't have his senses and that sent him into a panic. He squirmed, heart beating fast, "K-" wait. Slowly what happened last night came back to him. It was with a sinking heart that he realized he still didn't have his powers back.
Maybe it hadn't been that long. Just a few hours.
He could still be fine.
His body told him that he needed the bathroom. He wasn't sure if he'd woken Kate or not, but in case he hadn't, Matt tried to get up sneakily. Given his head injury, his aching body, and his lack of powers, the jury was out on how well he was managing trying to stand up while sharing a bean bag without bothering the person next to him.
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Date: 2025-05-12 06:47 pm (UTC)But maybe it was those words that did the trick. She couldn't remember hearing something that made things as right as hearing those last words before he fell asleep.
Like a promise that everything would work out.
"Hmmmm." Kate frowned, hiding her face against his shoulder as everything shifted. She was the kind of morning person that refused to be a morning person, always striving for at least an extra half an hour in bed.
But sleeping on a bean bag was nothing like a mattress and, when Matt tried to get off it, Kate practically rolled into the empty spot, face-first.
"Umph!"
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Date: 2025-05-12 06:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-05-12 07:05 pm (UTC)She had never seen a more mortified man in her entire life.
Not able to help it, Kate bursted out laughing.
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Date: 2025-05-12 07:14 pm (UTC)His brow furrowed, straining to regain his senses, but to no avail yet. There was a momentary look of dejection on his face before he focused in on Kate. "How are you feeling?" He very carefully reached out to grab the blanket, trying to ensure it covered her. "Still cold?"
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Date: 2025-05-12 07:30 pm (UTC)He looked much better. Less weary, at least. And that was a lot to say.
"Im fine, actually. This thing was warmer than I expected." However, as much as her day had started in such high spirits, his clumsy hands spoke for themselves. Matt still couldn't hear any better than she did. "Honestly, crazy as it sounds, it was the best sleep I've had in ages."
Maybe, like finding a home, it's the people you share with and not the place what does the trick.
"What about you? Do you need anything? Water?"
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Date: 2025-05-12 07:43 pm (UTC)He looked relieved at hearing she was all right. "Glad to hear it. I feel a lot better as well." Not great, but better. He'd take it. He hoped that meant he was on the road to recovery. "I didn't miss a mattress and silk sheets last night. I was out like a light, too." Their bodies had clearly needed the rest. "I can't remember the last time I slept like that." Certainly not since Fisk had risen to power. Maybe not since Foggy had died.
"I was going to the bathroom," he confessed, a flawed plan from the start. He couldn't find it on his own, even if he could reach his walking stick. He tried to get to his feet, but a dizzy spell made him stumble and reach for the wall until it passed. A beat. "Do you know what time it is? We should probably be heading out soon." Not that he could easily go back to Heather's like this. Oh, he knew his way around her apartment, but to explain how he looked? He'd need a story for it.
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Date: 2025-05-12 07:51 pm (UTC)Specially not in this state.
Watching him barely be able to stand on his feet, Kate pushed off herself the fabric they had shared as a blanket. She rushed to her feet, coming to Matt and grabbing hold of his forearm as her other hand found his lower back. It was so strange. How many times has she pretended to assist him? Now that it all had become real, she was unsure if she could do a good job at it.
"No idea. But let me help you to the bathroom and I'll check, yeah?"
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