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streetlevel

Leave Matt a message below!

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From:

streetlevel

Not this artist. I prefer cooking from a state of peace.

I'm not trying to shamefully provoke anything when I cook for Foggy's family or the church ladies!

From:

hawk_shot

You're a zen cook?

[Kate audibly gasped.] See? That's where you fucked up! Because Foggy's family I can get. But the church ladies? You love making their old panties feel alive again. Admit it!

From:

streetlevel

I'm happiest when I'm zen in the kitchen.

Stop, stop it, first the kitchen is ruined and now you're ruining church for me, too.

From:

hawk_shot

What if you're feeling like celebrating then? What's your activity of choice?

Hey, I'm just stating facts here! Not my fault if you do things unconsciously. [She coughed.] Around horny old ladies.

From:

streetlevel

I sometimes cook to celebrate, or go out to eat. A nice glass of wine or whiskey. Some good music. Nothing too big or crazy.

The more you keep going the longer it'll be before I can cook again for you.

From:

hawk_shot

Was it always like that? [She's not gonna ask if those are his 'old man activities'.]

I thought you said Jesus was very forgiving.

From:

streetlevel

No, I was probably a little more wild in my college and early twenties days. I was broke then though and still tried not to be a hooligan, so even then it probably wasn't anything too scandalous.

Forgiveness can't wipe away those mental images you put in my head. You're gonna have to work to remove those.

From:

hawk_shot

Okay, you can't drop that bomb on me and not give me an example of your wild days, Matthew.

Fine, fine. Actions are bigger than words, huh? Okay, what's my penance then?

From:

streetlevel

They honestly weren't even all that wild, Kate. Just loud parties, things like that. Not counting my other kind of training.

Good question. I'll have to think on it. Saying some prayers like they do in Confession won't really work for a non-Catholic.

From:

hawk_shot

Did you ever wake up with your tie around your forehead?

But isn't that extra work for a non-Catholic? You shouldn't underestimate that.

From:

streetlevel

Why would I have a tie around my forehead?

Those prayers don't mean anything to a non-Catholic. Penance is meant to be meaningful.

From:

hawk_shot

... Because people in the movies you can't watch sometimes do it? I don't know, I haven't worn ties enough times to figure if it happens in real life.

Should I whip my back instead? And before you say anything, nope, it's not a kinky thing.

From:

streetlevel

I'm blind but I still know where my neck is. I think that's a movie thing.

I'd never want you to have physical or mental harm done. Try doing a good deed for someone else. It's not about causing harm, it's about doing better.

From:

hawk_shot

It would make you kinda look like a ninja, though. An office ninja. Kinda fits you.

I guess that from now on I'll go out at night to try and save people in the hopes you'll forgive me and feed me, Matt.

From:

streetlevel

I wore a scarf over my face once and Jess said I looked like an asshole.

You already do that, so it wouldn't be an act of penance for the transgression now. I'm starting to feel like you don't want to make up for it. Which is fine, I can just have leftovers of that Korean chicken. I'm sure I can find someone who'll appreciate it.

From:

hawk_shot

Oh, that's not fair! Everyone looks like an asshole when they're drunk!

... [Kate stutters, unsure of how to get herself out of that corner where she's trapped herself.] What? No, no, of course not. I was just... I was just pointing out that I like doing things for other people. [She groans.] What do you want me to do? Offer to help at the church? I already did!

From:

streetlevel

... we hadn't been drinking. I just didn't want my face shown when fighting. [Was he really this boring that all his exciting stories had to do with Daredevil? He was now starting to wonder.]

I think the duck might like to be groomed. You could promise to go to the farm and give him a spa day.

From:

hawk_shot

Ah... Right. And you didn't have your suit? That's not... I bet you didn't look like an asshole! That sounds... Creative.

[She snorts] You want me to groom Quacker. Really?

From:

streetlevel

That's what I'm gonna tell Jess when I see her next. Public opinion says I'm not an asshole, I'm creative.

Let him swim in an oatmeal bath. Dry him off with hand-waved palm fronds. Massage his little wings and feet.

From:

hawk_shot

Of course I'm gonna have to see you with a scarf on your head first. But it sure sounds creative to me. You can even raise the bar matching your socks or tie to the scarf.

That's not a regular spa treatment for a duck. You want me to give him the VIP package. [She considers it.] I think a deal of that kind gives me a free pass on at least a couple more jokes.

From:

streetlevel

It was Jessica's scarf, it might be weird if I matched my socks to it.

Bold of you to insinuate Marshall isn't worthy of having this considered a regular treatment for him. I've named the penance. He gets a totally deserving treatment for a duck of his esteemed character, you get Korean fried chicken.

From:

hawk_shot

You don't own any scarves of your own? Because you're making it real easy for me to plan ahead of your birthday then, Matt.

Fine. You've got a deal then, Counselor. But you'll have to come with me to Clint's farm to make sure I actually fulfill my promise.

From:

streetlevel

I have scarves, I just didn't that day. Thankfully she did or else I'd have had to rip my jacket.

What other animals are on his farm? Aside from the tiny humans.

From:

hawk_shot

You clearly need to start carrying an emergency mask on yourself. [However, this brings up a question she's wondered about before. Both when it comes to Daredevil, Spider-Man and pretty much every other hero.] You ever feel cold in the suit during winter?

[Matt's question steals a genuine laugh out of her.] Laura better never hear you call her kids that! [Clint might find it amusing, though. Maybe he wouldn't even notice it. ... Specially if his hearing aid is off.] But anyway, I'd say the regulars. Horses and sheep and chickens, that kinda thing. Personally, I'm in love with the donkeys.

From:

streetlevel

Oh yeah. It gets cold as hell in the winter and hot as hell in the summer. There is no greater feeling on earth than a hot or cold shower afterwards, depending on which season it is.

In lieu of cows, I'll take time with horses and sheep. What do you like about the donkeys?